If…then…

So today is my blogoversary!  One year.  And I’m getting in a post just under the wire (and typing in the dark, so this should be interesting) and this is why:

My blogoversary also happens to fall on my husband’s birthday.  See, last year, he started working out almost every night after the kids went to bed and I started writing every night after the kids went to bed.  It has worked out for us very well, except the nights, ahem, like tonight when I fall asleep putting said children to bed.

It all started like this:

We went out to dinner (yeah, you would think I could at least cook a birthday dinner, but right now, going out is so much easier and tastier.)  Birthday boy chose Cracker Barrel – hey I never said we were fancy people.  It’s our joke that we buy the other’s dinner even though the money is coming out of the very same place, but tonight he was finished first and went to pay. I even commented that I was supposed to have bought dinner.  We arrived home (myself quite full of dumplins, thank you very much) and I turned to grab my purse – which was not in the car.

Mother F-U-*-K!”

So Mike took the kids in to start bath while I sped back to “the Barrel” hoping with my whole being that some schmuck had not noticed the purse and high-tailed out of there. (I would have had my purse if I had paid.  I’m just stating fact.)

And after realizing I was without a license at the moment and tags that expire in a few days (because my memory sucks lately…) I decided to slow down so I didn’t have to have “that conversation” with a cop.

Got there, there had my purse!  Whew!  Everything intact.  Whew!

Anyone who knows my husband knows this was the worst thing I could have done to him on his birthday.  Well, other than falling asleep with the child.  I’m 0 for 2 today.  He was sure someone was using our check card to buy a house or car (as if that would get approved) and our credit card to buy electronics. But alas, all was well.  Hmmmm, maybe I should check out accounts, just to be sure…

Anyway, my phone rang right as I was getting my purse back (I had the phone with me, because the phone is pretty much velcroed to my hand most of the time.)  It was my brother calling to wish Mike a happy birthday.

We talked the whole way home (all of 8 minutes) and for a few moments when I got home.  Then I handed the phone to Mike knowing the battery was getting dangerously low.  They talked for a bit and then said goodnight.  I took my phone downstairs to plug it in to charge. And then got Nick into bed.

I have to say, my children’s sleep schedules have been FUBARed since this last weekend.  I don’t know who is more messed up (but I can guess it will be me after tonight) but it took Nicholas a long time to fall asleep tonight.  And I always catch up on my reader and e-mail and Facebook while I wait for him to go to sleep, so no biggie.  Except my phone was dead and it was downstairs charging.

I woke a few minutes later (OK, 3 hours later) because Nick was rubbing my back.  I looked at the clock expecting it to say 9:15 or maybe 9:30.  Instead I had 11:38 staring me in the face. Huh? How did that happen?  And since he had been rubbing my back, I couldn’t tell if he had woken up.  So I had to stay for a second to get my bearings and make sure he was asleep.

And then I came down to see if my poor husband had given up on me and gone to sleep – which he had.

So I have only one moral to this tale – when it’s your birthday – let someone buy you dinner!

My logic – if I had paid, then I would have had my purse which means I would have been home charging my phone when my brother called, so I would have called him back from the other phone, so I would have had a charged phone to take to put Nick to sleep, so I would have stayed awake, so I would have gotten to see my husband when he got back from working out and I was finished writing.  Or something like that.  Just saying…

Anyway, Happy Birthday to my hubby.  Happy Blogoversary to me.  And with that, I’m off to check my accounts and make sure we didn’t buy any houses or cars or electronics tonight.

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2 responses to “If…then…

  1. Brigid, this is one that I think you could sell somewhere! So cute. Such an enjoyable read. Think about pitching it somewhere.

    Happy Blogversary! I’m so glad you’re blogging. 🙂

  2. Happy blogoversary, friend! 🙂

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